Useful Tips

How to survive an eleven-year school marathon


Have you ever met parents who are completely satisfied with the school their children attend? I don’t! I think that our mothers and fathers had many complaints about the education system.

I have three sons: the older one is in 11th grade, the middle one goes to school for the seventh year, and the younger one is only gnawing pencils and tearing up the older brothers' notebooks. Despite the fact that I graduated from a pedagogical university and even once taught English at school, numerous surprises awaited me on my parents' path.

In eleven years, there was nothing: dozens of hours of telephone and personal conversations with teachers and school principals in which children study, useless parental meetings, an irresistible desire to transfer the eldest son to home schooling. However, the moment came when I suddenly realized that you can’t get anywhere from school, in one form or another, and formulated 11 principles that help us maintain physical and mental health:

1. Select the appropriate educational institution for your child.
This is where he can study up to grade 10 on his own, without the help of tutors. Of course, it is difficult to predict how a six-seven-year-old child will succeed in the tenth grade, but in any case, it is worth considering the interests and successes of the child.

If a son or daughter does not want to learn to read, does not like to reason and describe pictures, do not drag him to an institution with a humanitarian bias.

If he or she gets a different result each time, adding 5 and 5, forget about the math school.

If neither you nor the kindergarten teacher find any special inclinations in the child, drown out parental ambitions at least for a while and send him to a regular school near the house, and after elementary school decide what to do next.

2. Do not ignore the opinions of doctors, psychologists and speech therapists.
If the child has a chronic illness or is on a dispensary, listen to the advice of specialists.

My middle son attended a speech therapy kindergarten. During the physical examination, the psychiatrist did not advise giving the child to a language gymnasium, but I did not pay attention to this advice. The eldest son studied at this gymnasium, and it was the nearest school from home. In addition, I was ready to help my son with humanitarian subjects. However, after several months I realized that I was wrong: the child went to school without interest, preferring to look out the window rather than listen to the teacher. In the evenings, we re-studied what was going on in the classroom, and then did our homework. I gritted my teeth and periodically broke into a cry, and the child sobbed and invented reasons not to study.

3. Do not be afraid to change schools.
When my patience ran out, and my son began to develop neurosis, we transferred him to a private school, where there is a more home-like environment, and there are eight rather than thirty people in the classroom. A year later, the son became the best student in the class and still has a positive attitude towards school.

4. Pay attention to continuing education.
I worked at a sports school for many years and more than once observed how problematic, from the point of view of a comprehensive school, a child literally blossomed in the classroom. Hobbies helped many children to believe in themselves, improve school performance and make true friends.

5. Explain to the child that teachers are also people.
They may have a bad mood and personal problems, a complex nature and even a low intellect.

6. Assure the child that you will support and protect him in any situation. The main thing is not to hide anything from you.

7. Explain to your son or daughter that school is only a small part of life. Take a walk, have fun and travel. Allow sometimes to skip lessons.

I will give an example from my school childhood. Until the ninth grade, I studied well, until I had a conflict with a new geographer. As a result, I almost stopped going to school, and finished the quarter with an incredible number of triples and a deuce in geography. To say that the parents were in shock is to say nothing. However, when the passions subsided, my mother accepted my refusal to go to school, setting one condition: instead of hanging out in the streets, I will stay at home. What a blessing it was - neither before nor after that I had the opportunity to read for days on end!

8. Do not scold children for evaluations: 50% they depend on the attitude of the teacher. No matter how scolded the exam, now children are much less dependent on school teachers, which means that you can pay more attention to the necessary subjects.

9. Share your memories of the school. Feel free to talk about deuces and problems.

10. Teach your children what you can do.
Practical skills, such as peeling potatoes and knitting, are much more useful for life than knowing the valency of chemical elements and the ability to prove the Pythagorean theorem.

11. And finally, the main life hack: stop hoping that the school will educate and educate your children. Take upbringing and education into your own hands. Spend as much time as possible with children, do not forget to praise them, criticize less often, help, protect and support, and then you will remember school years with joy.